Tuesday, October 22, 2013

I Refuse to Sink






Hey guys, I've realized that I have been neglecting my blog quite a bit, and that's going to change. From now on, I will be posting twice a week, Mondays and Fridays, in the evening. These past two weeks have been rough for me, I had lost some of my inner motivation for my sport, competitive swimming, and this week I finally picked myself up with the help of my dad and swim coach. I had started feeling like I wasn't good enough, like I was being judged, and just burning myself out as well as losing sleep and my self confidence. Over the weekend I convinced myself that I wasn't going to swim and make myself miserable so something needed to change. I had to stop thinking that I couldn't do this or that, the interval was too fast, I didn't have a good day, or whatever other excuse I was making up in my head that wasn't positive twoards myself. All the fun was being sucked out of swimming. I took a step back and refocused on my goals, one of them being that I'm going to have fun at practice and stop being so hard on myself, and on Monday of this week I came back strong and ready to kick butt, AS WELL as have fun and enjoy myself, and I accomplished that. Today I went to morning practice, the gym, and afternoon practice. It nearly killed me, but I refuse to sink! I made practice fun for myself, laughing and thinking positive.
Last week I promoted to Airman in my Civil air patrol, although it's one of the lower rankings, I consider it to be a huge step in my life. I did something that I've been wanting to do for the last year!.
I recently discovered a song that really spoke to me, it's a song I wish I could have heard a few years ago, it's called More beautiful you By Jonny Diaz. All you girls especially, give it a listen! It speaks the truth. There can never be a more beautiful you! Also, another uplifting song I really like, Brave by Sarah Bareilles, got my spirits up and also gave me the courage to say what I wanted to say and help another swimmer out with her shoulder troubles. Music has always been a big part of my life in some way, it motivates me, inspires me, gets my adrenaline pumping through my veins to push through the last few reps or miles, makes me happy when I'm sad, and gets my mind off of troubling things. A goal of mine is to pick others up when they fall down, and to teach them to be their own hero so that when things get rough, they can come back stronger on their own. I want to be able to inspire other girls to just focus on being the best that THEY themselves can be, and to not worry about who they aren't being, what they aren't doing, what boys like them, and 
to just focus on living their lives, enjoying their family, respecting themselves, and have high self confidence in themselves. And Vice Versa for you guys as well! Never lower your standards just to be accepted by someone, or to seem "cool" or whatever it is you're trying to attempt. If somebody doesn't accept you for they way you are, forget them. There is absolutely nothing wrong with just being you.  A few of the pictures I use are not owned by me and I do not take credit for them, except for the CAPS photo of me:) 




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